The Ruse
by schmackie
Summary: It's pretty ingenious though, don't you think...I mean, if you can buy some person for the night to basically be your sex slave, then maybe if you pay them enough they'd have to like marry you or something." Good idea, no? He thought so, too.
1. Chapter 1

29-year-old, Maria Kanellis, entered the hotel room, meeting her guest for the night.

"I need the cash up front." She told the tall, toned, and very naked man resting on the bed. He reached onto the bed side table and gave her the $3000. She placed the wad of cash into her purse before joining her mate on the bed. He kissed her lips as he unzipped her dress from the back, causing it to fall and releasing her breasts from the encasement.

Maria inwardly groaned. She was new to being a hooker—well escort, really, but no one ever called the number in the classifieds for anything other than sex. This wasn't how she planned her life.

No, she was a marketing executive for magazine ads. A very important woman she was. Maria lost her job after the CEO of the company found out about her sleeping with her manager. She was in love with him but that didn't matter, as she was under a strict contract, the violation causing immediate termination. When she was kicked out of her apartment, she moved to the south side of Chicago. Her apartment was a ratty old place. The paint on the walls a mucus green with cracks all over, accented by a shag brown carpet. One of the windows was broken and covered up with a trash bag, the others with intense condensation marks. It was her home and she did what was necessary to make ends meet, even if it meant sacrificing her body. One more job like this one and she's be able to move out of the projects.

She kept her attention firmly on her company, taking control as she slowly slid her hands and traced over the many tattoos on his arms. The man kissed her sloppily, his saliva dripping down her jaw.

Oh, how she hated her job.

**A/N: Hello everyone! I've decided to start a new story! This is just a test chapter. Ya know, just to see what you people think. There will be more next chapter! I promise. Let me know what you think! I really want to know!**


	2. Chapter 2

"Jesus, dad! Would you just let it go?" 32-year-old, John Cena groaned into his cell phone, jutting down Interstate 90.

"Son, all I'm saying is that your brothers are all in committed relationships and I just want to know what's taking you so long."

"You know, this is why I don't come home as often."

"What happened to Liz? She was great."

"Pop, she just… er, wasn't for me." John avoided. His parents absolutely _loved_ his old fiancé, Liz. He didn't have the heart to tell them that she had been cheating on him while he was on the set of his last movie.

"Your mother's friend, Diane's daughter is just a few years younger than you and—" John panicked. He had been set up by his parents before and it ended in disaster when he spilt his drink on her. He thought of the first excuse to come to his mind.

"Dad, you… uh… didn't let me tell you."

"Tell me what?" John Cena, Sr. questioned his son, interested.

"I… uh… have a girlfriend."  
"Well that's great but why didn't you tell me?"

"You were too busy trying to set me up with mom's friend's daughters."

"Honey, John's got a girl!" John heard his dad tell his mother, Carol, who made her excitement clear when John heard his mother's voice through the phone. "Ooh, finally." Her voice became clearer as he heard some static and her questions, "What's she like? Is she coming to Matt's wedding? How long have you been dating her?"

"Hi, ma." John greeted his mother. He hadn't spoken to her in about eight months and even though he was a grown man, he had to admit he missed his mother,

"Hi, Johnny. When can I meet her?"

"Uh, I… am not sure."  
"Bring her to the wedding. I'm sure Matt and Cindy won't mind."

"Uhm… oh.. _kay_?" John was so confused. What had he gotten himself into? He had to think of something quick.

"Great!" His mother's exhilaration sent a pang of guilt through his chest. _Shit_. "Here's your father."

"So, how long have you been with her." He had to make it sound serious.

"Four months?" He guessed. That sounded stable, right?

"Hmm… not bad. Well I got to go. I'm tired. See ya next week!" John heard a dial tone. He stared at his phone in utter shock. _What the _fuck_!_ He spent the rest of his car ride to the Allstate Arena in Chicago, thinking of a way to find a chick who he could pass off as his girlfriend of _four months_. John pulled into the parking garage. After he parked his car, he made his way inside to the basketball game. He spotted his friends who were meeting him there at a VIP table, including his best friend, Randy, bragging about some hooker that he hired.

"Man, she was so hot. Best time I had in a while."  
"Too bad you had to pay for it." Cody Rhodes commented, taking another sip of his soda.

"How much was the pussy anyways?" Ted DiBiase questioned.

"$3000 but worth every penny."

"Who?" John asked, sitting down across from Randy.

"Some expensive pussy."

"It was _amazing_ though. She did this thing with her tongue when she went down. She was real flexible, too. At one point, I banged her against the wall with one leg up on my shoulder." John laughed at his friend. Ted, Cody and John never heard him rave this much about a chick since Sam, Randy's ex-wife. They ended it when Sam was sick of Randy away from home shooting movies all the time. He was crushed but he got over it.

"Where'd ya find her? I need some after the conversation I just had with the 'rents."

"Aw, how _is _your ma doing? She still sore from when I fucked her?" Cody teased.

"Fuck you, man. That's nasty." John punched him, but he missed as Cody quickly moved his shoulder out of the way.

"She still mad that you ain't married yet?" Randy seriously asked.

"Yeah. But I just got so sick of it! My dad wanted to set me up with some other chick. I flipped out and told them I was dating some girl. I don't even fucking know what the fuck happened!"  
"You screwed yourself over." Ted informed John, slapping a hand on his back.

"Thanks for your words of wisdom, Teddy."

"Codes, let's go. I need to whiz like a pregnant chick." Ted told his friend.

"Fine. See ya later, guys." Cody and Ted headed off in search of a bathroom.  
"Man, get that smile off your face."  
"I can't man. That chick was amazing. _Shit!_"

"Where'd ya say you found her?"

"Classifieds. I was looking at the cars for sale and I found it."

"You mean to tell me you accidentally went into the personals?"

"Yeah."

"How the _fuck_ does that happen?"

"The pages stuck together and the ad popped out at me."

"Whatever, man. I don't believe you."

"I don't care. Me and a bunch of the guys are going to a club tonight. You wanna come, too?"

"Sure. Why the hell not. I just gotta figure out how I'm going to find myself a girlfriend that I've apparently had for four months."

"Cool. Look there."

"Maybe…"

The men sat talking for a bit before Ted and Cody returned and they left to search for their seats before the game started.

**A/N: I know this one's short too, but I'm proud for finally updating quickly. Now only one person reviewed last chapter but about 25 people read… the reader/reviewer ratio is off balance! Oh no! We must restore order!**

**Go ahead… start restoring… you know… **_**review? **_**Thanks!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Sorry for the late update guys! I had it written but wanted to change it. I didn't like the way it was coming out. So here's the good (hopefully) chapter!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the characters, just the idea.**

* * *

Chapter 3

* * *

"C'mon, dude!" Randy Orton growled, lazily leaning on the wall of the men's room.

"I had to piss since half time was over. And it's not like I was going to miss that finish!" John replied, shaking the last few drops out.

"Two shakes is enough, buddy." Cody called from the sinks.

"Fuck you man." John retorted as he pulled up his fly. John headed to the sinks and ran his hands under the water before the three headed out and towards the exit to meet Ted.

"Tedward, are you sure you don't wanna use the bathroom?" Cody double checked with his friend.

"Yeah. I have an abnormally large bladder."

"Too much information." Randy stated as he began the walk to the car.

"Yeah and an abnormally small dick." Cody mumbled to John. The two burst out into hysterics as Randy and Teddy looked at them like they were crazy.

Fifteen minutes later, they were at the club. Randy wandered off, seeming to be looking for something. John headed to the bar to get drinks. He looked behind him to see Ted and Cody messing around before following him to the bar.

"Two." John mouthed to the bartender who brought him over two beers and took the ten John had lain on the bar.

"For me? Oh, Johnny, you shouldn't have!" Cody gaped and stole one of John's beers.

"No. It was for Randy. I didn't know where he went so I figured I'd get one for him."

"Aww, trying to get your fuck buddy drunk?" Ted asked before sipping his own beer.

"Fuck you, man!" John went to find a table. John felt eyes on him as he walked, and he wasn't even in the bar for two minutes. _Great_, he thought as he began looking around. _Hey, maybe I'll find someone who I can take to Matt's wedding._

John looked around the club, the people dancing and grinding to the beats of the techno music, the crowd at the bar trying to get drunk for various reasons. His attention was turned to a tall blonde. 'I don't think she's my type.' His eyes washed over the hordes of people all over the club, stopping every once in a while when he saw a potential mate for the night.

"This place is pretty seedy." Ted commented, looking around.

"You see Randy? I wanna know where the fuck he ran off to." Cody asked.

"Probably the bathroom. Assholes like him don't have a big bladder like me." Ted boasted. John nursed his beer some more as Ted and Cody bantered back and forth. Randy met them at the table with a beer.

"Man, where were you?" John asked.

"I thought I saw that girl from last night."

"Why would a classified hooker be in a bar?" Ted offered.

"She wouldn't be. Probably with some other fuck for the night." Cody bluntly stated.

"Yeah, I guess not." Randy sat down, defeated.

John was still worried about his parents. Matt's wedding was next week and he had no idea how he was going to explain this to his parents.

"Right, John?" Ted asked.

"Sorry, what?"

"Randy could just get another hooker." Cody added.

"Yeah, Rands. Just get another one." John informed his friend. "Get over it. It was a one night stand."

"Yeah, I guess." Randy took four big gulps of his beer. John began to stare around at the people, again. What if he could just say she couldn't make it? Or he could say that they just broke up. But then why did he tell his parents about her in the first place? Ted was right, he screwed himself over. He reached for his beer and took a sip, but nothing came out.

"I wonder who was the first hooker?" Cody drunkenly wondered. His friends groaned, Cody was always an inquisitive drunk.

"It's pretty ingenious though, don't you think?" No one answered. "I mean, if you can buy some person for the night to basically be your sex slave, then maybe if you pay them enough they'd have to like marry you or something." Cody rambled on some more.

Randy tried to shut him up. "Cody, that's slavery and that's why prostitution is illegal." Randy always tried to be a smart ass whenever he could. He loved out smarting people, even if it didn't make any sense.

"Randy, prostitution is illegal because police officers don't want people selling their bodies for sex and transferring diseases." Ted informed the drunken men.

_God, these guys are idiots,_ John though to himself. He got up to get another beer and he noticed Randy follow him. John leaned on the bar and Randy followed.

"Why are you so hung up on this chick?" John asked his friend.

"I don't know, but I'm over it. Like you said it, was a one night stand and I'm gonna try and find another chick to occupy my night with."

"There ya go." John turned to the bartender, trying to get his attention. He held up two, one for him and one for Randy. The bartender brought over two and Randy placed down a ten. John started to head back to the table and noticed Randy was behind him. He looked back and saw his best friend talking to a girl who was clearly drunk off her ass. John proceeded to the table. He sat down next to Cody, noticing Ted was gone.

"Where's Teddy?" John questioned while scanning the club for his friend.

Cody pointed toward the dance floor where Ted was grinding with the tall blonde chick that John saw earlier. He nursed his beer some more and tuned out Cody talking about the night's game.

A few drinks later, John's vision and judgment started to get blurry. He went to the bathroom. The beer went right through him.

When he was done pissing, he went to the bar for a sixth drink. Back at the table, he noticed Cody was gone, too. He glanced around the club and saw Ted grinding with the blonde chick and another looking jealous. Cody was dancing with a petite blonde. And Randy was hardcore grinding with the drunken brunette from before. John thought about what Cody had said: _I mean, if you can buy some person for the night to basically be your sex slave, then maybe if you pay them enough they'd have to like marry you or something._

It might have been that he was tired.

It might have been that he was drunk.

Or it might have been that it actually was a good idea, but John was truly considering hiring someone to be his girlfriend for his brother's wedding.

Just how was he going to pull it off, you ask?

He didn't think that far ahead yet.

Hell, he was too drunk to remember what he had done five minutes ago.

**A/N: Sorry I haven't updated in a little while. School just ended and I was a **_**little**_** stuck. But looky here, it's chapter three. You've read it! Now review!**


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